Hooter Pridley didn’t stand a chance. One look at
“Miss June” Trixie Foxalot, posing seductively in her lime
green bikini with a torque wrench, and he was smitten.
He couldn’t bring himself to turn the calendar page,
even as the months flew by. His destiny was clear, or
as clear as it gets for “a water bug skittering across the
surface of thought.”
     Thus, quitting his auto-parts job and jumping into
his 1970 Barracuda, Hooter begins a redneck odyssey
across the West, leaving mountainless Sterling,
Colorado, to search for the calendar girl of his dreams.
On the way to LA, he meets a number of memorable
characters, finding friends in unlikely places—
Mormon Goths, Rastafarians, brothel grifters, a rabbi
with a mean left hook and the unforgettable Luxum
DeShane, a wise homeless clarinet player with a
mysterious past—not to mention all the loony patients
Hooters sees while posing as Dr. Pridley, psychiatrist
to the stars.
     Relying on his plucky spirit and folksy wisdom to
propel him along, Hooter gets himself in and out of one
sticky situation after another while learning some life
lessons along the way. Fast-paced and sidesplittingly
funny, If Every Month Were June is Tony Bender at his
satiric best.